im trying so hard to not let emotions get involved. im failing and i dont know where or when to draw the line. for as honest and outspoken as i am, i can never say the things that matter to me most. im simply lying to myself. i look back on past entries, and clearly i am. how many times, with how many different people, have i tried to just stop caring? its so frustarting to know that i cant even listen to myself. because the outside me thinks it knows whats best from me and is telling me to move on. and the inside me, the one i try to ignore, is telling me fucking open up and just take a chance. whos right and whos wrong? it seems like theres no winning, only loosing.
Monday, September 28, 2009
i feel like ive been neglecting a friend.
im trying so hard to not let emotions get involved. im failing and i dont know where or when to draw the line. for as honest and outspoken as i am, i can never say the things that matter to me most. im simply lying to myself. i look back on past entries, and clearly i am. how many times, with how many different people, have i tried to just stop caring? its so frustarting to know that i cant even listen to myself. because the outside me thinks it knows whats best from me and is telling me to move on. and the inside me, the one i try to ignore, is telling me fucking open up and just take a chance. whos right and whos wrong? it seems like theres no winning, only loosing.
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